ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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