i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
The adults are the big ones right?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
