so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
