So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
