yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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