is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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