when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
