**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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