"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
