you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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