she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
