Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize