two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
She needs sedatives and a leash
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize