i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I think I just shit out all my problems.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
