Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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