why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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