Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
