Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
