i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
