I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
