Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
he fucked my hip out of place.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
