it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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