once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
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