There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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