can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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