why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
