Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
