girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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