yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
