Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
