Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
