I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
