Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
