I wish I could punch you in the face.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
