I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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