omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
