I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
