just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
