She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
