She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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