i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
