Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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