We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
