Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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