Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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