She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
