the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Randomize
