Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize