I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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