You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize