That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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